Recovery is a journey that thrives on connection, yet many people find themselves building invisible walls between themselves and the very communities designed to support their healing. This workbook addresses one of the most common yet rarely discussed barriers to recovery success: comparing out—the tendency to focus on differences rather than similarities with others in recovery.

When we compare out, we use surface-level differences in circumstances, substances, consequences, or backgrounds to convince ourselves that others' experiences have nothing to teach us about our own journey. We may think thoughts like "I only used alcohol, not 'hard drugs' like them," or "I never lost my job/home/family like they did," or "My addiction only lasted a few years, not decades." While these differences may be factually accurate, they often serve as protective barriers that prevent us from accessing the wisdom, support, and connection that could transform our recovery experience.

Comparing out exists on a spectrum from obvious to subtle. Sometimes it's explicit rejection of others' experiences because their stories seem too different from ours. Other times it's more sophisticated—intellectual analysis that finds logical flaws in recovery concepts, maintaining that our situation requires a fundamentally different approach, or participating in recovery activities while keeping parts of ourselves separate and reserved.